Facebook, Mass Destruction, and Al Gore

            The thought occurs to me how thankful I am to be a parent now and not say 40 years ago.  Although it also occurs to me that 40 or so years ago, being a stay-at-home-mommy was much more accepted than it is today.  Frankly, most people either have this wet dream, idyllic, fantasy about perfect children, home, clothes, cars, etc, or they look upon you with disdain.  Silently I think most “working” mothers seem to believe that it is sheer laziness that drives me to be a “professional” Mommy. Before I get hate mail I’ve seen the looks, folks!  You know what I’m taking about.  That look that says I don’t know if I should pity you (because of your lot in life), hate you (because deep down I too have deluded myself into believing that I too want to be Mommy, and am secretly jealous), or despise you (because I know that you are just lazy and could never hold a “real” job).  I’m not just being incredibly insightful; I know this to be true because I have had these thoughts  myself.  I have greeted “those” mommies with a sigh and a condescending smile.  But I digress, I was speaking about the convenience factor of being a Mommy today.

            Frankly I don’t know that I could do it if it weren’t for several modern conveniences.  First and foremost is Facebook, really the internet in general.  Having three small children often limits my contact with the outside world.  I mean come on!  It takes 10 minutes just to get everyone in the car and buckled in!  That’s not counting the hour it took to get everyone ready to go, or the arsenal of stuff we have to pack around.  If I need a gallon of milk (and I ALWAYS do) there is a very tense 20 minutes spent in the parking lot of the grocery store just getting kids in and out of the vehicle.  Just think Frogger with three children instead of frogs and for real—not a game!  So the internet allows me to communicate with other adults (at least I think they're adults) and allows me to shop without dragging my three terrors through a crowded store full of things at eye and arm level.  You know that kid on TV that knocks over the beautiful stack of oranges—my kids have done that except it was watermelons.  Did you know that watermelons can bounce twice before breaking?  I’m sure you’ve seen that kid on TV, reach out an arm, while sitting in the cart and clear a whole shelf.  My kids did that except it was three shelves at one time!  Needless to say we’ve been asked to leave two Wal-Marts, a library and we might be banned from Winstead’s (a local KC burger and ice cream joint) after my kids touched a display of ice cream glassware sitting enticingly on the counter.  All I have to say is that those two gentlemen from Harvard who invented Facebook should be canonized!  Facebook is my only life line some days.  Oh, and a big shout out to Al Gore for inventing the internet!  Peace out!