Why Having a Toddler is Like Being at a Frat Party

This was originally an email sent to me by a girlfriend who’s a fantastic mommy!  My hope is that someday I will have the endless patience that she seems to possess in spades and the gentle, quiet self-assurance that comes from one who has become deaf and immune to the shrieking, swirling chaos that is motherhood.  Thanks for the funny, Erin.  So in the tradition of Late Night with David Letterman let’s get to the Top 10 Reasons That Having a Toddler is Like Being at a Frat Party. 

10.  There are half-full, brightly-colored plastic cups on the floor in every room. Three are in the bathtub.

 9.  There's always that one girl, bawling her eyes out in a corner.

 8.  It’s best not to assume that the person closest to you has any control over their digestive function.

 7.  You sneak off to the bathroom knowing that as soon as you sit down, someone's going to start banging on the door.

 6.  Probably 80% of the stains on the furniture contain DNA.

 5.  You've got someone in your face at 3 a.m. looking for a drink.

 4.  There's DEFINITELY going to be a fight.

 3.  You're not sure whether anything you're doing is right, you just hope it won't get you arrested.

 2.  There are crumpled-up underpants everywhere. (This is SO true.  I find underwear everywhere I look!  It's insane really.)
  

And the number one reason Why Having a Toddler is Like Being at a Frat Party…

      
You wake up wondering exactly how and when the person in bed with you got there!

                                      

             Thank you, thank you!  I’m here all night.  Try the veal. 
                    Enjoy your weekend, folks.  I am outta here!