Tuesday, January 31, 2012

10 Little Known Facts

     I've had a rough evening. I've had dealings with a passive/aggressive bitch person that, for reasons I can't get into on here, I am unable to cut out of my life. So occasionally she starts shit and I have to just take it. It puts me in a bad mood and it causes me to lose whatever spark of creativity I might possess. So I figured instead of just leaving a big blank space on the blog for today I would just list a few little known facts about myself. But what I really want is to go all Ghostbuster's on her ass. (Ya know, show that prehistoric bitch how we do things downtown.)

Without further ado,
Ten Things You Don't Know About Me.

 1. I'm Hispanic. I know.... I don't look it and my ass certainly doesn't look it either but I am. Here's my daddy to prove it.  Yeah he really does look like that, we don't age...it's cool.
My Dad.
 2. I wear flip flops all year long--at least until the snow goes over my feet.
 3. I make some of the finest drunk cuisine known to man. Ya know the food you eat after a night of drinking and making a fool of yourself. You can ask anyone who has partied with me.
 4. My favorite appliance Yes I have one. Don't you? is my Dyson. I love it more than the children. Because it does work and the children don't.
 5. I have considered the fact that I just might be a vampire. One, I prefer night to day. Two, sometimes I think I have super powers like reading people's minds. And three, my skin is all glittery a la Twilight. Like stripper glittery. The tanner I get the glittery-er I get. It's weird. People have seriously asked me what kind of body lotion/make up I use to get the effect.
My baby brother.
 6. I have a younger brother--Unka Joe. This is him. I think he has a dangerous, biker look about him. Yeah he's a hottie. He's also single so if you live in the Kansas City area, you might email me and I might be persuaded to hook you up...maybe. Not promising....
 7. I don't know my left from my right. I mean I understand the theory but in practice--not so much. Too many years in the theater totally screwed up any chance I had. (When you are on stage facing the audience your right and left are backwards. If you didn't know.)
 8. I once ran for school board in my town, because I was bored. I came in third. Seventy-six people voted for me. What were THEY thinking?
 9. I can two-step. I live in the boonies; it's required by law.
10. I know Ronald McDonald. I worked for a McDonald's franchise for over 15 years, working with Ronald was part of the job. Ronald is one of my Facebook friends in real life. I will give anyone $20 bucks if you can guess which friend. Oh and don't count out the women there are a few female "Ronalds".

     So there you go! A few random facts that you didn't know about me. Did you learn anything that makes you think about me differently?

Peace Out!
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